Investing In Our Children

Orison Swett Marden, in his book pushing to the front said, “Give a boy purpose and determination no matter how poor his chance and you will hear from him”. What purpose are we instilling in our children? What direction are we leading them to?

We invest in the future of our children when we regularly find the time and space to spend quality time with them. What can we do with them during such time? Just stay with them and give them the chance to be with you. Listen to them with emotions. Learn from them as they learn from you. Pay attention to their needs. Get involved in what they do such as playing in-door or out-door games with them. Kids love the personal touching feeling contact they get from their parents and grandparents most especially from the dad. They see their dad as a hero, a role model.

As they are growing up, letting your children experience you from time to time in different scenarios is an invaluable investment in their future. Exposing children to various situations and experiences helps them develop essential life skills, problem-solving abilities, resilience, and empathy. It broadens their perspectives and prepares them for the challenges they may encounter as they grow older. It's like providing them with a toolkit for navigating the complexities of life.

Giving your children the opportunities to experience some of your ups and downs as they are growing up can be incredibly beneficial for their emotional development. It teaches them that it's normal to experience a range of emotions and helps them learn how to cope with them in healthy ways. Additionally, it fosters trust and openness in your relationship with them, as they see you as a real and authentic person with feelings just like theirs.

Let them see you playing your different roles in life. For example, let them see you playing your role as a father or mother, as grand parents, as a sister or brother, as an employee or an employer. Let them see you playing your role as a peacemaker. Let me them experience your role as a caring human being, as a giver, as a good neighbour, etc. Let them experience your spirituality through your active participation in your local Church. Share your views on important national and international issues such as poverty, social exclusions, etc. Also, listen to what they have to say about such issues too. As far as children are concerned, they learn more from what you do with them than from what you say to them.

The more things you do with your children, the more you are likely to develop bond that will last forever. This will be part of their childhood memory. For example when you eat with them, you help them build great table manners. When you watch TV with them, you help them with the choice of what is good and what is bad in television programming. When you read with them, you help them build their self-confidence. When you do all of this with your children, you are passing on your values to them. You are laying a great foundation for the future of your children.

Some parents bring up their children in fear. They use the fear of fear to make them comply with their instructions. This, in my humble opinion, is wrong parenting. There is no fear in love. Fear takes love away from children. It also reduces their self-confidence. Resist using ‘God’ as an instrument to instil fear in your children. Children will soon become adults when they will begin to challenge their childhood beliefs. Teach them to learn that God is love and in Him, there is no fear. If you love someone, you do not want to hurt that person. Fear cannot win love. However, love can overcome fear.

Give your children self-esteem and remind them of their innate ability to achieve anything they put their minds in life. Teach them to always aim high. Inspire them to success and become their first life coach.

The three greatest and most lasting gifts you can ever give to your children are the gift of wisdom, the gift of love and the gift of understanding. These are indeed invaluable gifts that can profoundly shape a child's life. Children learn these three great virtues mostly from their parents and through what you, as a parent or grandparents, do. Never be afraid to discipline your children when it becomes necessary but that must be part of an integrated learning process.           

As their first teacher, make it a habit to notice the learning style of your children and develop your teaching to fit the needs of each child. Understanding your child's learning style is crucial for effective teaching. Some children learn best through visual methods, others through auditory or kinesthetic means. Adapting your teaching style to match their individual preferences can greatly enhance their learning experience and academic performance

Unproductive parenting compares the ability and skills of one child with the other. Do not be the unproductive parent. Let each child grow according to his or her natural talent and ability. You are there to nurture what God has put inside of each child. You are not to add or take way anything. 

To me, I do not believe there are bad children. Give a child the right environment, the right purpose and a nurturing parent, sky is his or her limit.

Invest in the future of your children. Give each of them a great head start. You will hear from them.